Every once in awhile, my friends and I discuss the need to remove the attachment we have to food.í Some people just donít get it. Some have no idea what weíre talking about, and others think that itís like a light switch that a person can turn on and off.
For some of us, food is the one constant in our lives. Itís always there, and itís reliable. Doesnít argue, doesnít talk back. And we can zone out while weíre together. If you donít believe me, watch people eat popcorn! Talk about unconscious eating!
But along with the effort to feel what weíre feeling, acknowledging the good, the bad, and the ugly, comes the discomfort. And where have we always gone for comfort? Food. Itís not a choice for me these days. To be honest, however, that last sentence should read Ďfood should not be a choice for me.í
Itís hard to sit in the moment, to feel the pain and discomfort, and resist food for comfort. Iíve discovered over the past few days the reason for this discomfort. Itís invariably the fact that Iím choking back, or even swallowing, the words I want to say. Itís generally a situation in which there will be an argument, or serious discussion, and I donít usually feel safe enough to speak my mind.
So, Iíve been trying to change the way I look at these situations, and trust me, itís been hard. This swallowing of words and reaction has been going on for more than 45 years. Itís ingrained. Iíve taken a step back and ask if Iím exaggerating the danger. And I usually am. And when I speak my mind, that food urge disappears. Thank goodness.
Itís a baby step here, but an important one. Itís about learning a whole new way to look at the world, to analyze it, and to react to it. Detach from food? yeah. Big time. But for me, itís more like getting rid of a wheelchair and cast, and learning how to walk again.