An interesting news item today, that being in love translates into extra pounds for women. they gave a number of reasons, but the one that caught my eye was the warning about matching your mate mouthful for mouthful. In general, men can eat more calories than women without gaining weight, so we women donít have as much leeway.
But that sparked other thoughts. How many of us sit down to dinner with family or friends, and feel uncomfortable if we finish our meals before they do? How often do we go after the appetizer and the bread simply because theyíre there and weíre together and itís a sharing kind of moment? Or perhaps thereís even a bit of competition to make sure that we get our fair share, whatever that might be.
On the other hand, whatís more romantic than sharing a decadent dessert while snuggling in a romantic restaurant or in front of the fireplace? And those lovingly prepared, special meals designed for romance and more. Whatís a person to do?
Let me first say that itís been a long time since Iíve been in love [are the matchmakers among you paying attention???]. But still, it might go back to a combination of mindful eating, and separating emotions from food. In theory, at least, mealtimes with those we love can be a time to share thoughts, catch up on the day, relax. Itís not about competition. If it is, maybe thereís something else going on in the relationship that food canít fix. Letís be honest. Food canít fix ANY relationship.
Those of us whoíve had the weight loss surgery generally finish our meals first, because theyíre small. Then what? What do we do while everyone else is eating? Itís a problem. We canít sit there and pick – going back for more is a sure way to out-eat the surgery. The general strategy is to enjoy everyoneís company, and communicate.
So, why do women in love tend to gain weight? Lots of reasons, of course, but perhaps all the lessons weíve learned about mindful eating and being comfortable while other people are eating can help. But this doesnít address any of that romance and food link. Everyone needs more romance. Perhaps the challenge is one that we face in so many other aspects of our lives: separate the food and the emotion. Separate romance from food. Sigh.