There have been some interesting conversations with people over the past few weeks, and they’ve made me think about what I’ve been calling the ‘fat personality.’ Doesn’t sound pretty, does it?
I’ll admit, however, that it might not be a ‘fat’ personality, but rather the result of something else, although I have no real idea. Some traits:
• scheduling everything for everyone, except ourselves
• being so overwhelmed by all the details that we have trouble doing anything at all
• food is accessible and an easy way to soothe, comfort, distract, and deal
• exercise is nearly impossible to schedule, and difficult to do
• everyone else is worth the effort, but not ourselves
If we were being very judgmental, we might say that these are just excuses, but frankly, we know better.
The reality is that taking care of ourselves just doesn’t come naturally. It’s hard. So many of us are caught in the middle of demands on our time and emotions, and we take the stress and confusion out on ourselves. We end up feeling helpless, angry, and out of control. The end result often seems to be a form of helplessness and despair that permeates all aspects of our lives, from friendships to marriages, from school to the workplace. We deserve better, and we need to figure out how to convince ourselves that we do.
One of the conversations I referred to at the beginning of this posdt was with a woman who has lost about 25 pounds by watching her diet. Our discussion focused on the idea that she’s not making the time to exercise. I have hopes for her success.
Another conversation was with a woman who is so overwhelmed by finances, work, family, and all other aspects of her life that she has trouble holding it all together. In my view, her first priority probably shouldn’t be her weight. But, any step that she takes to get control of her life will be positive.
I saw myself in both of these women.